O Tannenbaum
Dec. 13th, 2008 08:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Went to get a Christmas tree and it was one of the most pleasant experiences of my life. Here's how it played out:
(Arrived at random Christmas Tree lot)
Dave: Hi! Merry Christmas! (motions us over to a table and begins to put cups and ingredients together.) Welcome! Let me tell you about my business! I started selling trees 8 years ago. I didn't know what I was doing! I had no business plan! Well, one day I was drinking hot chocolate and a customer came to get a tree and said, "Gee, Dave, I sure wish *I* had some hot chocolate." So I said, "Hang on a minute; I'll go make you some." So I did. They liked it and now I make hot chocolate for all my customers. Here, have some!
Me: (Takes hot chocolate.)
Dave: Look around. Let me know when you find a tree you like!
So, Mr. checkers and I walked around, scoping out the trees and drinking Dave's hot chocolate. I was looking cute in my bright red scarf, and OMG THIS IS THE BEST HOT CHOCOLATE EVER. We found a tree we liked.
Me: (points to a tree) We like this one, Dave.
Dave: Great! Let my hunky young minion get that for you.
One of Dave's hunky young minions came over and hoisted the tree on his shoulder. He took it over to his station where he started up his chain saw to cut a little off the trunk.
Dave: You can go inside and pay my mother.
Me: (eyes glued to hunky minion) Um, go ahead. (motions to Mr. checkers)
Hunky Minion: (saws tree, shakes loose needles off, and prepares to bind it lovingly into a netting)
Mr. checkers: Dave's mom says she wants to take our picture.
Me: Huh? A picture?
Mr. checkers: A picture with our tree. For their photo album.
So, Dave's mom, who was dressed like MRS. CLAUS, snapped our picture with the tree. For their PHOTO ALBUM.
Hunky Minion: Allow me to tie this lovely tree to your car.
Mr. checkers: Here, let me give you $5 for your efforts, since my wife has enjoyed watching you so much.
Me: Hey!
Dave: Stop by anytime! I'll make more hot chocolate!
Me: We love you, Dave! I promise I'll never buy a tree from anyone else!
We now have the bestest tree in the world.
(Arrived at random Christmas Tree lot)
Dave: Hi! Merry Christmas! (motions us over to a table and begins to put cups and ingredients together.) Welcome! Let me tell you about my business! I started selling trees 8 years ago. I didn't know what I was doing! I had no business plan! Well, one day I was drinking hot chocolate and a customer came to get a tree and said, "Gee, Dave, I sure wish *I* had some hot chocolate." So I said, "Hang on a minute; I'll go make you some." So I did. They liked it and now I make hot chocolate for all my customers. Here, have some!
Me: (Takes hot chocolate.)
Dave: Look around. Let me know when you find a tree you like!
So, Mr. checkers and I walked around, scoping out the trees and drinking Dave's hot chocolate. I was looking cute in my bright red scarf, and OMG THIS IS THE BEST HOT CHOCOLATE EVER. We found a tree we liked.
Me: (points to a tree) We like this one, Dave.
Dave: Great! Let my hunky young minion get that for you.
One of Dave's hunky young minions came over and hoisted the tree on his shoulder. He took it over to his station where he started up his chain saw to cut a little off the trunk.
Dave: You can go inside and pay my mother.
Me: (eyes glued to hunky minion) Um, go ahead. (motions to Mr. checkers)
Hunky Minion: (saws tree, shakes loose needles off, and prepares to bind it lovingly into a netting)
Mr. checkers: Dave's mom says she wants to take our picture.
Me: Huh? A picture?
Mr. checkers: A picture with our tree. For their photo album.
So, Dave's mom, who was dressed like MRS. CLAUS, snapped our picture with the tree. For their PHOTO ALBUM.
Hunky Minion: Allow me to tie this lovely tree to your car.
Mr. checkers: Here, let me give you $5 for your efforts, since my wife has enjoyed watching you so much.
Me: Hey!
Dave: Stop by anytime! I'll make more hot chocolate!
Me: We love you, Dave! I promise I'll never buy a tree from anyone else!
We now have the bestest tree in the world.
no subject
Date: 2008-12-14 03:41 am (UTC)Yay for beautiful Christmas trees! I hope it looks even more splendid when you get it decorated.
Orationem pulchram non habens, scribo ista linea in lingua Latina.
I can totally read this now! Yay for education! :D
no subject
Date: 2008-12-14 04:21 am (UTC)Reading Latin is pretty impressive.
no subject
Date: 2008-12-14 03:46 am (UTC):D
the narrative reads like it has Newbery potential ...
no subject
Date: 2008-12-14 04:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-14 05:06 am (UTC)*needs sleep*
no subject
Date: 2008-12-14 02:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-15 08:17 pm (UTC)*but in a good way*
no subject
Date: 2008-12-15 02:23 pm (UTC)Checkers, I--I cannot even begin to describe my joy (and incessant giggling--OMG FRENCH GEROND I SEE YOU) upon reading this post. I totally believe in its Newberryness. I--I think I will reread it. Because I can totally visualize all of it
especially the Hunky Minionand it's just so wonderfully Christmas-yand Hunky! :-Dno subject
Date: 2008-12-15 04:21 pm (UTC)But my scarf IS red and cute, Dave makes the best hot chocolate ever (crushed peppermint on top), and the minion was young and hunky. That's all true.
ICON LOVE
Date: 2008-12-15 06:01 pm (UTC)also I'm pretty sure you got all the important details right. :-D